Sound of Sweet Silence

Almost immediately after I set up the new blog, I found myself at a loss for words... Or maybe that is not quite accurate... I found myself bewildered by the form, and struggling to sort out which voice this might be, and how it might fit into the many forms of communication I practice in my life.  I have journaled for years and years, and have 4 or 5 boxes of journals in my closet--but that private writing of my soul doesn't quite fit in with this public forum, especially as a person with an already public life as a minister.  And as a minister, I have other forums for expression, most notably preaching, that marvelous challenge and gift to which I devote two days of my life each week, plus Sunday mornings.  Preaching is a distillation of my thoughts and feelings and spirit stirrings in the cauldron of communal life, the relationship with my church community.  And preaching also becomes a public voice, for the sermons appear on our church website in written and podcasting form.   

Then there are the many other forms of communication in the work of ministry.  I have said that most of ministry is about talking and listening, in one form or another.  Meetings with groups, chats over dinner, phone calls, hospital visits, listening to the intimate revelations of the heart.  Not to mention the public voice, the letters to the editor, the presence in the work of particular struggles for justice.  And each of these spinning threads of connection between myself and other people.   So it was easy at first to imagine the blog as another forum, another avenue of expression and connection. 

But then, peering at the blank square of the blog "new post", amidst these many words of ministry, I found myself experiencing a craving for silence.  During my sabbatical I had been visiting a deep silence, a silence that opened up the interior life, a silence that made room for an inner dialogue.  I had the incredible gift of time to wander into the depths of my soul and discover how vast is that terrain--and of course to realize that this inner world is expansive in each of us.  Now, every day I notice my yearning for that silence, and each morning I try to make time to enter it as deeply as I can--but often I am just opening the front door, and pausing in the vestibule.  And yet it is ever present, and illuminates the work of ministry with wings of mystery.  

Is there a bridge that can span the inner silence of one soul to the inner silence of another?  Can I bring my inner worlds into a larger web of communication, and if I could, what would be the purpose?  Is there something about the blog, in the vast hidden expanse of cyber space, that invites this silence to express itself?
And if silence can speak, might it have the capacity to open my ears, or your ears, to hear the sound of one hand clapping?

Journeys of my Soul

Greetings from Sabbatical Land!

I want to share some highlights of my journeys of the sabbatical, to give you a flavor of what I have been up to, as we prepare for my return to A2U2 in January.

There were some physical journeys-

To Unity, Maine for the Earth Activist Training, led by Starhawk and Charles William. It was an opportunity to explore what is happening to the earth, our home, and grow in my understanding of food, soil, energy, gardening, and hope. For those who like books, I might suggest The Earth Path, by Starhawk, for a taste of what we were studying. This is me learning how to grow mushrooms with inoculant and cardboard.

Later, Margy and I went back to Unity for the Common Ground Fair--our first time there!  Later, I learned even more, right in Portland at the Kindle Bioneers conference.

To Winslow Park in Freeport for time by the sea--the weather was unpredictable, and I honed my skills in setting up a tarp with poles and string. Nothing to do but watch the sea, make food, and maybe swim. Delicious relaxation!

To Acadia National Park, for getting more acquainted with this beautiful state we call home--and also learning humility in the face of my limitations, and confronting anxieties about heights.

To a Leadership in Ministry workshop, in Newton, MA, for work on family systems and its impact on the work of ministry.

To Ottawa, Canada for the Convocation of UU ministers, plus a journey into my ancestors world.

This is me sitting next to my great grandmother’s gravesite (the tiny stone) in Ottawa, the location of which we hadn’t previously known. Her name was Claudia Tremblay, and I have my middle name in her honor.

At Convo, I also participated in a preaching workshop, where we experimented with preaching without text or notes. Many new ideas to try! I was nurtured by the time in worship and fellowship with my UU ministry colleagues.

To Rochester, NY and to Parkersburg, WV to visit Margy’s family, and to visit my parents and two of my sisters. It was a time of integration for me--to really accept my family members for just who they are, and to really be myself with them more freely. This was the other half of the family systems workshop, for isn’t that the challenge with our families--to be ourselves and yet to stay connected, despite our differences? This is me and my mom.

These outer journeys were balanced by significant time devoted to the inner journey--

I think of it as the journey toward wholeness and integration of my Self--to explore the dimensions of my soul and personality, to revisit old dreams and make peace with old regrets, to nurture the divine spark within, and to come into deeper alignment with my truest calling and purpose.

I found a book that served as a helpful guide for this meditative work--called Kissing the Limitless, by T. Thorn Coyle. If you are looking for a real spiritual workout, I recommend it highly.

What else can I tell you about? Margy and I had some sweet relaxing time to be together. I took good care of my body by dropping sugar and wheat from my diet--it feels great! Lots of walks in the woods and by the shore. (And after these several months, I think I will loosen up to indulge in one sweet treat each week--I have to make a little leeway for those marvelous church potlucks.) I switched from a PC desktop to a Mac laptop, got a digital camera, and am enthusiastic about the creativity gently released with these new resources. I rearranged my office at church, and cleaned up my office at home. (Well, I am still working on that one...)

And I can’t fail to mention that I took some time out of sabbatical mode to canvass, hope, and finally grieve about the marriage referendum in November. I stood with my Religious Coalition colleagues, and the dedicated leaders of the No on One Campaign as we committed ourselves anew to the work of justice and dignity for all. We will keep standing on the side of love.

This last month of the sabbatical I am thinking about re-entry into A2U2 life. As you may recall, one of my questions going into the sabbatical was how to make a ministry that was a sustainable and balanced life, not a recipe for stress or burnout. Some of that work is within the self--how to be more relaxed about my life and less perfectionist and over-functioning, how to be aligned within. Some of that work will include a few changes in my weekly schedule, and I have been looking at patterns for my days and my weeks.

I am beginning to think again about worship, and enthusiastic about experimenting with new ideas in worship. I am looking forward to seeing all of you, and meeting the new folks who’ve joined us in the last few months.

Most of all, I am filled with a deep gratitude to all of you, the members and leaders of A2U2, for this gift of time. What a privilege it has been to go on this journey of the soul. I can’t express how much it has meant to me! I hope that the lessons learned will enrich my ministry with all of you in countless ways during the coming months.

Here’s to the New Year!

love, Myke