Facing What Is Larger Than We Are

We are always surrounded by what is larger than we are. Sometimes it is beauty: the unfolding of the plant world in spring, the generosity of strangers, the soft feeling of petting a cat, all these natural phenomena that we can barely begin to explain. Sometimes it is tragedy: the illness of those we love, violence that makes no sense, the destruction of the natural world, hatred between peoples. How do we live with so much that is beyond our control?

The poet Rainer Maria Rilke wrote:

Even as the farmer labors

there where the seed turns into summer,

it is not his work.  It is Earth who gives.

Our attitude toward the larger beauty and tragedy is strengthened when we first acknowledge our limits—amazingly we sometimes think we are in charge of something! No—we are not in charge. But we also have much more power than we know. We can influence our surroundings by how we live within our larger reality. One of the most important questions to ask ourselves is “Am I acting now from fear, or from love?”

Margaret Marcuson writes: “It takes a lot of energy to be afraid. I find that usually when I'm afraid, I'm living in an imaginary future. My mind has traveled down a path to a situation which does not actually exist. I'm only afraid it might exist, and I can imagine it so fully that adrenaline floods my body. Living in the non-existent future, especially when it's negative, saps my energy and limits my resourcefulness in the present.”  (See her website for other great tips for congregational leaders http://margaretmarcuson.com/)

She referred me to a book that identifies some strategies for moving from fear to love. It is called 8 Habits of Love, by Ed Bacon, an Episcopal minister in California. When we act from love, the ripples affect all those around us. Here is a summary I adapted from Margaret:

When we are generous, others are more inclined to be so.

When we make time for stillness, those around us can calm down.

When we know our own truth, we can challenge others to think for themselves.

When we are candid, communication by all becomes cleaner.

When we play, we and others will be more creative.

When we forgive, we can release energy for our work in the world.

When we are compassionate, the energy we would use to judge others is available for more creative giving.

When we understand community, we can both set boundaries and give support.

So whether we are facing beauty or tragedy from that larger world, let us cultivate these habits of love. That is something we have the power to do, and something that ultimately is healing for our world.